When I first started studying and assisting Yoga Teacher Trainings I searched for the breakdown, the breakthrough, the thing that was going to blow my world and reconstruct it just as rapidly.
I, hand on heart, felt at times that there was something wrong with me because I didn’t fall apart within processes like other people did.
It felt like my strength and steadfastness reflected me not being open or malleable enough. Something I needed to change.
I now have a more intimate awareness of my unique way of processing, and understanding of how it reflects me.
My mum always said growing up, “Patience is a virtue”, and "Good things come to those who wait”.
Although there is potentially much to pick apart here within her conditioning and how that rubbed off on mine, I now understand more than ever what she was saying; it is a developed skill to wait for something calmly, without the need to rush or control it. It is important to trust in and practice patience within a growing process after planting the seeds.
I recognise the urgency and anticipation that has arisen initially when I have stepped into a process in the past. The energy around the belief that we are devoid of time is strong and these days more then ever we are lead towards looking outside of ourselves for the answers. Read this book, do this course, follow what I’m doing and your life will transform, and yet it doesn’t work in the long run.
When we jump in for the quick fix we are not prepared for the ‘inconvenience’ of having to feel for ones self, nor equipped to experience the temporary discombobulation that comes from deconstructing and recalibrating.
It takes work.
In truth, I thrive in the work and live for the quiet epiphanies and awakenings that roll one from another like waves on an incoming tide.
I have always been in it for the long haul, and every process has humbled me by reminding me of how potent and enriching an experience can be when we allow ourselves to simmer in it. When we are patient within it.
It’s about bravely placing one foot in front of the other on the stepping stones, mindfully enough to feel into, and get equipped enough, to manage the wobbles and avoid falling completely.
It's also about acknowledging that each seed planted is a whisper of intention, AND a real practical earthly effort to create and activate the most vibrant and luscious space to live and thrive in.
"Patience is a virtue." - English Proverb